The Kidney Walk Looking Glass

Yay! On Sunday, we complete our first National Kidney Foundation's Kidney Walk. I proudly wear my "RECIPIENT" label. Impressed by their presence and above-and-beyond generosity, I am amazed at the high number of people tagged "HERO" and "DONOR." I'm especially awe-struck by the folks labelled "DONOR FAMILY," the term typically associated with the family of a deceased donor. 

Theres a local radio station(99.5) sponsoring the walk. After a few songs, the dj hands the mic over to a NKF rep, who starts with "Raise your hand if you have 2 kidneys..."  The bulk of the crowd's hands go up. 

"Raise your hand if you have 3 kidneys..." A splattering of us raise our hands, and the rep pauses and scopes the crowd, his eyes briefly settling on me and my outstretched arm. I feel the eyes of other humans(not numbers like 26 million Americans waiting on recipient list, but real, touchable, concrete I-could-reach-out-and- hug-them humans) in need, people who want to be in my place. Their stares burn a little with a bittersweet combination of envy, hope and inspiration.

The rep interrupts my self-consciousness with a booming "Now, raise your hand if you have 1 kidney!" And all of us possessing multiple kidneys applaud with genuine, whole-hearted appreciation. 

I expect the kidney walk to be positive and meaningful; I am not prepared for the overwhelming rush of heart-tugging emotion that is taking over my typically controlled demeanor.  I wipe away tears and look around wide-eyed at the huge crowd of once complete strangers that has morphed into a big, loud and engaging family bonding at a family reunion.

We stroll around the pavilion, checking out the kids' activities and people watching. I notice all the different team shirts and find myself pulling for each one. I want Little Logan's Dream Team to find a match for Logan, the cutest little red-head who clearly just started walking. He parts the crowd like Moses and the Red Sea, steadily advancing while pushing a folding chair as he toddles along. 

I sincerely hope that Mama Castro gets her transplant soon. Team Infinity looks like they're having a blast with tons of teenagers and their fun, tie-dye shirts. Spiderman & His Amazing Friends have a bunch of kids with them; I'm guessing whoever needs the help is surrounded with love from this motley crew. I wonder about all the other people waiting for kidneys, the ones who don't have a huge team to support them, the ones who are not a visible presence here at the walk. 

So... In very Alice-in-Wonderland fashion, I've been changed by my journey. I hope everyone will take this into account when reading my next few lines...

• If you donated to our team, THANK YOU for being so generous and willing to help anonymous strangers in need.

• If you read my blog, THANK YOU for sharing my experience and supporting me as I grow.

• If you're already part of my support system, THANK YOU for letting me lean on you, for encouraging me when things feel bleak and for being exactly who you are.

• If you'd like to do more, please consider donating your organs, eyes and tissue so that you can live on by helping one of my family members I haven't been lucky enough to meet yet.

Click the link to DONATE LIFE and register today!

http://donatelife.net/

With Thanks, Respect and Love

Dear Donor Family,

It has been over two months since I received from you the most generous gift anyone has ever given me: a kidney and pancreas from your loved one.  As I gather my thoughts and reflect, my mind often wanders to your family, wondering how you are, imagining you recovering from your loss and wishing you strength now and always.  

I wonder about meeting you, I wonder if you would welcome this idea. I wonder how difficult it must be living with the loss of your loved one.  On the day I celebrate my new beginning, I wonder how you are mourning the last day of his life.  I wonder if this letter, filled with my own optimism and gratitude, will cause further grief, knowing that it was the death of your loved one that fueled my new beginning.
  
I hope that in reading how his generous gift has brought about my new beginning, you will find comfort in knowing what a valuable impact your loved one, my hero, has made.

This new beginning is miraculous for me.  My twenty-two year struggle with diabetes and  two-year battle with kidney failure are over. I am no longer plagued by insulin shots, dialysis, high blood pressure, a heart condition, high cholesterol or anemia. My children no longer bear the burden of my limitations. 

How do I express my appreciation for the gifts you have given me? How do I thank the family whose grave loss renewed my life? I haven't figured this out yet, and I hope that this letter is a start.  I hope that you find some solace in knowing that our appreciation for your generosity is limitless.  

I know that my new-found life is only possible because of your family's selfless act, a selfless act that unveiled your generous and benevolent spirit even in your darkest hour. I promise you that this selfless act will never be taken for granted.  I look forward to learning more about you and your loved one, celebrating his life and honoring his memory. I promise to carry him with me, to take good care of him and to honor him with everything I do.

Please accept our deepest sympathies and our sincerest gratitude.                       

With thanks, respect and love,   

Michelle, Gabriella and Campbell