Hemodialysis again :(

Not me, but here's what a perfect chest cath looks like...

So I had the hemo cath placed 2 days later.  I was so worked up and anxious. I looked at old pics of when I first had the hemo cath, hoping it would help, but it only made my painful memories ring truer. I sat and cried in the waiting room as an elderly woman who just finished the procedure cheerfully walked out with her walker. I was shaking and muted as I lay in the stretcher while the nicest doctor I have ever met calmly talked me through how everything was going to be fine.

He was right.  They gave me anesthesia and I counted backwards from 10, and that's all I remember from my catheter placement surgery.  When I woke up, I ate some crackers, drank some juice and went home.

I started hemo dialysis the next day.  I still can't manage to get through a session without my legs seizing from cramps, my blood pressure dropping and feeling dizzy and light headed.  And, I'm angry that I have to be there in the first place.  The nurses and techs are nice, but I simply resent being there at all.  In 2 days, I'll have my revision surgery and will learn how long before I can resume PD at home.